Happy Mother’s Day

2010-05-22 copyMy first Mother’s Day wasn’t exactly as I had expected. I think it is human nature for women to fantasize what their first Mother’s Day will look like – flowers, pampering, a long nap, hugs and kisses from their child. One never dreams they will spend their first Mother’s Day in a hospital surrounded by beeping equipment, tubes and wires, and a meal in the hospital cafeteria.

We had already been in the NICU over six months on my first Mother’s Day. We were awaiting Joseph’s surgery to reconnect his intestines after a near fatal bout with Necrotizing Enterocolitis. We never dreamed we would still be in the NICU on Mother’s Day after our twins were born on Halloween. But, here we were. While I would have loved to have spent my first Mother’s Day at home, it just wasn’t possible.

My husband, extended family, and NICU staff did everything they could to make my first Mother’s Day absolutely amazing – even while being in the hospital. My husband schemed with Joseph’s primary nurse to create a priceless photo and foot print in a frame, my husband showered me with gifts, it was that weekend we made our first four generation photo with my mom, my grandmother, Joseph, and myself. We inflated an air mattress and spent the night before Mother’s Day in Joseph’s room – I wanted to wake up with Joseph in the same room. The nurses served “breakfast in bed” complete with donuts and orange juice.

While it was nothing like I expected my first Mother’s Day to be, it was perfect.

For more ideas on celebrating moms who are in the NICU or hospital on Mother’s Day, check out this great article from Jennifer Degl.

Today, on Mother’s Day, even if you find yourself in a less than ideal first Mother’s Day situation,  you are celebrated. You are important. You are special. You are loved. You are a mom.

Today, on Mother’s Day, we remember those who are moms but their children are not on this earth to celebrate with them. We remember you. We remember your child. We mourn with you. We think of you. We celebrate you on Mother’s Day.

To all moms – moms who have children on earth and children in heaven – Happy Mother’s Day.

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About The Author: Laura Martin

A former middle and high school chorus teacher, Laura B. Martin is the Director of Parent Communication and Engagement at Graham’s Foundation. She is mom to Joseph, Campbell, and Emily. Joseph and Campbell, fraternal twins, were born at 24 weeks gestation. Campbell lived for 23 beautiful days. Joseph spent 228 days in the NICU and experienced a near fatal bout with NEC that left him with Short Bowel Syndrome. Joseph faces many complications as a result of his extreme prematurity. He has a g-tube, auditory neuropathy, hypotonic cerebral palsy, asthma, vision impairment, hypothyroidism, Eosinophilic Esophagitis, and multiple food allergies. Even still, he is a happy and active child. Laura, her husband, Scott, Joseph, and Emily live in the South. Laura can be reached via email .